Our Zoo

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We stocked up on pets right after we bought our house in 2005. Two came courtesy of my sister-in-law (a cat on the day we moved and a dog shortly after). A couple have passed away since then. Right now have two dogs and a cat.  I love them all despite their individual oddities. They’re a little quirky but who isn’t, right?

Our cat “Pretty” came to us from the garbage behind a gas station in Indiana but yet she only drinks out of the faucet. Apparently shortly after coming to live with us she realized she had picky taste. Good thing she was rescued or she’d have never made it out there. She’s a content indoor cat who only wanders outside on a few occasions when the weather is nice and we’re outside enjoying it. Other than that she spends her time reupholstering anything she can with her luxurious white fur, coming in to chat with you while you’re on the toilet, and bitching when her food bowl is nearly half empty. Pessimist.

Our cocker spaniel “Reagan Juniper Darling” (I know, a little overboard) is the sweetest dog. She’s never had puppies but she’s the mother of everything, I didn’t worry about how she’d do with the baby at all – I knew she’d love her and look out for her…and probably trying to eat her shitty diapers because that’s what sweet little disgusting dogs do. She’s not the most intelligent dog and is always getting herself into predicaments like getting stuck in awkward places (see my previous post “Doggone” for just a taste). Reagan also sings whenever our phones ring. We used to have personalized ringtones and she actually has them all mesmerized. The other day Sugarland’s “All I Wanna Do” came on the radio and though I changed my husband’s ringtone years ago, she started howling to the music. Apparently she’s like me and never forgets a song.

Our mutt “Jaxson” is a mix of border collie and german shepherd and who knows what else. He’s the smart one but also a nervous wreck. I worried about how he’d be with the baby but turns out he loves her as much as he does his mama. He’s the biggest  but wants to be a lap dog (ironically, a common trait in big breeds I guess). He’s our oldest and aside from his old dog farts that will clear a room, he is a beautiful dog for a mutt. With his markings I think all the time that there should be breed for him. But, alas he’s the only one and aways will be since he’s fixed. (Which was a crazy experience in and of itself. When he woke up from the anesthesia after being neutered he freaked out about the stitches and ripped them all out so the vet had to restitch his mangled skin). Also, even though he’s fixed he still manages to get it on with our cocker spaniel when they both routinely pick the best of times and entertain our guests whenever we have a party by getting knotted up out in the yard and being a spectacle for our guests. He’s really a scaredy-cat though. He’s terrified of thunderstorms. He’s terrified of his own shadow. And he’s terrified to walk down the hallway at night too. When he stands at our bedroom entrance and stares out into the hall as far as he can I always know he’s contemplating if it’s worth  the unknown of what may be hiding around the wall in the shadows waiting to bite him. Just when I think he’s decided to stay a willing prisoner in our bedroom forever he seizes a moment of bravery and flies like a bat out of hell into the hallway…except on hardwood flooring he kinda just skates in place for a while very noisily. Our bedroom is diagonal from our bathroom and our bathroom is diagonal from the kitchen/living room entrances and I’ve gotten the pleasure of witnessing this Ice Capades extravaganza and let me tell you, it’s quite humorous. I’m contemplating buying him a glittery skating costume.

The animals kinda took to the baby the way they did each other. Pretty will be in the same room with the baby occasionally but isn’t very impressed with her and doesn’t pay her any attention. She’s kind of stuck up. Reagan wants to tend to every squeak or fart that the baby makes. Jax freaks out like an unsure daddy when she cries and he gets close to me and whines like he’s telling me he needs me. The day we put her in her jumper that hooks to the door frame he nearly had a heart attack trying to figure out what the contraption was and the second she got bored with it and let out a cry he went apeshit and began whistling and whining like it was hurting her…”Just like he knew an evil contraption like that would do”, is what he was saying I’m sure. He spends the rest of his time guarding her.  That, or he’s just staying close so that he can let out his silent but deadly farts at the precise moments one of her noisy ones escape so he can blame it on her. He’s done it to my husband and I in the past so I wouldn’t put it past him. After we caught on and then started blaming him for our farts he probably figured it was time to move on to a new victim.

The cat could care less who you are or what you’re doing. The dogs have to know everything and signal if anyone dares walk in front of our house…or across the street….or anywhere within eye shot by barking ferociously. It’s our little zoo and it’s cute to observe…at least up until the dog farts, that is. After that you gotta get the hell outta dodge for a while until his ass cloud dissipates.

(Seriously, they’re that bad…I am writing this after having to take the baby and leave the room for a while.)

Our Zoo: Jaxson, Pretty & Reagan (and Punkin' who's no longer with us)

Our Zoo: Jaxson, Pretty & Reagan (and Punkin’ who’s no longer with us)

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  1. Pingback: 100 Things | The Write Side of Life

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